Friday the 13th

Great, another crappy re-make of a sequel with one of the stars of the CW’s Supernatural which I totally watch by the way. The movie takes the stance that we are to forget that the 10 movies preceding this one never happened and we are simply picking up many years after the first one graced the silver screen in 1980. Personally I am insulted that I am expected to forget that Jason X ever happened, you know, the one where he is in space, yeah that was a classic.

PLOT Opening to a black and white flashback, we see the final moments in the life of Mrs. Voorhees as she is given the beat down and beheaded by a camp counselor while little Jason watches in the reeds. Due to a lack of universal health care, Jason grew up one f’d up dude with a mommy complex and a severe case of angst until he snaps apparently 30 years later and begins to murder those who trespass and fornicate on his property. Why he waited so long is beyond me but continued to bothered me throughout the movie.

So it’s the present and a group of twenty somethings enter Jason’s domain in search of a marijuana grove and pay the price with their lives dun dun dun. When a few more weeks go by another crop of kids arrive at Crystal Lake to enjoy Spring break in Trent’s family cabin when they run into Clay, a young tousle haired boy on a motorcycle who is looking for his sister who disappeared from the area. Jenna, Trent’s girlfriend, takes a shine to Clay because she too watches Supernatural and thinks he’s dreamy, decides to bail on her friends and really crappy boyfriend to help him search the woods and neighboring houses for his sister. Little do they know, Jason is looking for them muahhhahaaa!

FINAL THOUGH Luckily I didn’t expect to enjoy the movie which saved from the crushing disappointment I felt. I ask a lot from my films including the slashers so my opinion may not be fair as this was clearly a an attempt to introduce this genre to people who normally don’t watch horror. The unfortunate side effect of this is that these movies have a tendency to be pussified and completely forgettable. Hell, I’ve forgotten most of it already.